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May 06, 2006

Is it supposed to feel different?

Today my boss came into my office and asked me how it felt. I knew what he was talking about but since I haven't really felt anything I prodded him.

"It feels great to be done with that one brief for that one client."

"No," he said, "How does it feel to be done with school?"

I'd thought about my answer to that inevitable question for the last week or so and I really don't feel any different. Sitting here the morning before graduation feels like any random morning before copyright.

Way, way back in the day when I finished undergrad there was a tangible difference. The day I turned in my Epistemology final in December 1994 I hopped on my bike to ride home and I was hit with this weird fit of yawning. It was a nervous tic, basically. I yawned myself to sleep that night out of uncertainty about the future. I was right in being nervous about finishing undergrad since I bounced around from random corporate job to random corporate job for the next 6 years.

So, no I don't feel any different after finishing law school. For one, I have the same job anxiety I had twelve years ago. The firm I work at now isn't hiring so I need to find a job although I promised to hang around to write briefs until July. Whether that promise gets me places in August is another story although I'm confident about my boss's pull with other firms in the area. Also, 12 years ago I was single with no prospects. Now, I've been with the same woman for over 10 years, have been married for almost 5 years and have lived in the same house for almost 4 years. Stability is something I have now that I didn't the last time I graduated. Plus, I still feel like I'm learning. Everytime I hear about a court decision I feel the need to read it, analyze it and think about the arguments that should have been made or could be made on appeal. I suppose it's a tad cheesy to say that a lawyer never really graduates but that's how I feel right now.

Posted by Half-Cocked at May 6, 2006 02:59 AM

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About never graduating: Exactamundo. About feeling the need to read every court decision I hear about? Not so much. Am I supposed to be doing that!? ;-)

Posted by: ambimb at May 11, 2006 07:17 AM

A lawyer's work is never done.

In some ways I'm glad I didn't go back to school and get the law degree I considered getting. But, at the same time...

You should have no trouble finding a job.


Posted by: phat at June 2, 2006 12:29 AM