Diagnosis
I saw the surgeon today and the news was exactly what I thought it would be. I have breast cancer. He removed everything that was there, including some additional tissue around the tumor and some of my muscle. The margins are all clear, which is good. The tumor was 1.8 cm, which isn’t small, but it isn’t big. Even though I expected this news, it doesn’t make it any easier to hear. I am relieved to know, though, and to be able to begin to fight.
Tomorrow I will spend the day at the hospital going through a series of scans of my body to find out if the cancer has spread. A week from tomorrow I will return to the hospital for yet another surgery to remove any infected lymph nodes. After that, I will meet with a couple of oncologists so that we can determine what my treatment plan will be. The surgeon suggested that since I am young there is a 90% chance that the oncologists will recommend chemotherapy. Radiation is another possible treatment, and I can elect to have a mastectomy if I want to. I have decided not to pursue a mastectomy at this time since there isn’t any more cancer in my breast. However, if later genetic testing reveals that I am genetically predisposed to breast cancer I may decide to do that.
I am still processing all of this, I think, and maybe I am in a little bit of shock right now. It has all happened so very, very quickly. I would never have predicted two months ago that I would be facing something like this.
I sent an e-mail out to family and friends today to let them know what was going on. The response I have received has been absolutely overwhelming. I can see that this support is the thing that is going to get me through all of this. I don’t know if I could do it without knowing that all of these people are behind me. They have been amazing. I know that many of you are reading this now, and I wish that I could convey to you all how much your words of kindness and compassion and love have meant to me. That sense of peace I was talking about yesterday? I think that this is where it comes from.
Comments
I found your blog through my friend Robin (www.theothermother.typepad.com).
I think it's smart and intuitive of youto write through and about this experience.
In the early 90s, I taught writing (through Writers In The Schools) to children in the pediatric ward of MD Anderson Cancer Clinic in Houston. The program was inspired by a woman named Katie Ferguson, who believed that writing was a way for her to stay connected to her true, core self while dealing with her cancer. I'm glad you're writing.
Posted by: christa Forster | May 20, 2007 07:59 AM
I found your blog through my friend Robin (www.theothermother.typepad.com).
I think it's smart and intuitive of youto write through and about this experience.
In the early 90s, I taught writing (through Writers In The Schools) to children in the pediatric ward of MD Anderson Cancer Clinic in Houston. The program was inspired by a woman named Katie Ferguson, who believed that writing was a way for her to stay connected to her true, core self while dealing with her cancer. I'm glad you're writing.
Posted by: christa Forster | May 20, 2007 08:00 AM
hi.... my friend sent me your blog....as we share similar lives.... i was diagnosed a week before my 35th birthday with breast cancer.....and i am now going through reconstructive surgery after my mastectomy....would love to chat with you!!!i've been there done that.... i wrote a series of articles for a local paper.....here is the link if you are interested.....http://www.northvalleycommunitynews.com/
best wishes and please contact me with any questions or concerns....
sincerely,
amy kerbeck
Posted by: Amy Kerbeck | June 30, 2007 01:47 AM