The Merits of the Case

For the past couple of months, I have been trying so hard to stay on top of my correspondence with all of you. I am woefully behind at this point, and will probably never catch up. Most of you know enough about me to know how much that drives me crazy. I want so desperately to be able to respond to each comment and e-mail, write thank you notes for your gifts, and return your phone calls and I just can’t keep up. And I am afraid it’s going to get even more difficult as chemo gets under way. I hate to have to send a generic thank you like this, but I want you all to know how much I appreciate everything that you all are doing for me and my family.

I don’t think I can even find the words to begin to express the depths of my gratitude to all of you, from my IRL (translation for those of you not hip to the techno-lingo: In Real Life) friends and family to my internet friends to the complete strangers who have visited this site. Your cards, gifts, letters, dinners, blog comments, e-mails, help with the kids and phone calls have been amazing and mean so much to me. Every single day I am overwhelmed by your love and support, and I read your words and listen to your messages several times. In the darkest moments (and there are some dark ones), and even in the not so dark ones, knowing that you are all out there truly gets me through.

I read The Diary of Anne Frank for the first time when I was in sixth grade in Miss Ellenwood’s class at Aboite Elementary School. I believe that was the first time that I had ever heard of Anne Frank, and I remember being incredibly moved by her words and by her story. I became fascinated with the Holocaust and I was horrified (and still am) by the atrocities that took place during that time. Knowing everything that Anne Frank and her family went through before and while they were in hiding and knowing that they were well aware of the horror of what was going on in Europe at that time makes the last words of her diary even more poignant. “[I]n spite of everything, I still believe that people are really good at heart.” Those words struck me immediately when I read them at 12 years old and I never forgot them because I have always felt the same way. Your powerful and unrelenting support for me since the moment I announced my diagnosis has proven to me over and over again how true those words are. People are more than really good at heart; people are quite amazing. Their generosity and kindness and love for their fellow human know no bounds.

No one wants to go through anything like this (and believe me, now I know that you REALLY don’t want to go through anything like this), but I hope that anyone who finds themselves on a similar path discovers the wealth and the joy in the love of their friends and family that I have found. I think I am actually one of the lucky ones, because I get to see and feel the outpouring first hand.

There are many bad parts of cancer. All of you, however, are the best part.

Thank you.