February 10, 2006

Advice to Legal Interns: Just shut it.

Want to know how not to interact with your internship supervising attorney? Well, here's a hint: Do not insult your supervisor's clients or her parking abilities. It's kind of a long story, but it features a law student who claims to be from “poor white trash and [who] was once attracted to bling,” so you know it's gotta be good.

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October 23, 2005

Top 10 Questions To Ask During Law Firm Interviews

Professor Orin Kerr of The Volokh Conspiracy offers a humorous look at the law firm interview process with a list of questions you should ask at a callback interview (not!). The lengthy comment thread is funny, too, and you can probably find some good advice mixed in, as well.

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October 04, 2005

Good Sports Welcome Here

A kind reader suggested we all might find some humor in this cartoon from a recent edition of the New Yorker. Heard any other good lawyer jokes lately?

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August 28, 2005

Hoya Slapsa!: Use this form...

Many of you starting law school about this time might enjoy this little bit of humor from Hoya Slapsa! about all the paperwork you've recently been required to file with the various offices of your school. The post is specifically geared toward Georgetown Law, but I saw much the same thing at my own school and I imagine the experience it mocks is a common one. [via the Scoplaw]

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August 04, 2005

Five minutes vs. a whole year? You decide.

With a synopsis like this, who needs three years of law school?

Hey, fellow 1Ls-to-be: we can skip straight to 2L now!

Hat tip to JD2B.

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April 12, 2005

Law-Related Thing that Sucks: Getting Into Law School

If you get into law school, you need to ask yourself: Are you feeling lucky? And do you have an eye to spare? That's the message of today's Law Related Thing that Sucks, a podcast series from Notes from the (Legal) Underground. This might be funny, depending on whether you've recently had your eyes poked out by a professor in law school. Give it a listen and you'll know what I'm talking about.

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February 25, 2005

Idiot's Guide: Plagiarism

Sometimes law professors replace their final exams with a final paper. If you're facing one of those in the coming months, and the deadline starts to get tight, Jeremy Blachman has just the thing for you: The Idiot's Guide to Plagiarism: How Not To Not Write A Paper, sponsored by the Committee for Moral Rectitude. Definitely some good tips there.

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February 19, 2005

What's Best About Being A Lawyer?

Evan Schaeffer of Notes from the (Legal) Underground recently asked his readers, “What do you like best about being a lawyer?” Some of you may be surprised to learn he got many many responses (42 at the time of this posting), and the question started tangential discussions on a number of blogs, which he lists here. The best best thing about being a lawyer obviously comes from “Conan”:
To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the women!
Oh, and this is also good, from “Mike”:
Seeing people harassed by the powerful pisses me off. The law generally allows you to sue someone hurting others. It feels good keeping someone out of prison. It's contest living -- Winning feels good. Ability and effort matter -- Lawyers who work to improve generally see tangible results. For me, this matters most of all. I would hate knowing that in 20-years, I would be at the same level of competence as I am now. Lawyers who establish a routine remain routine lawyers. Lawyers who seek excellence achieve it. There is a lot of independence -- Clients give directives and you must follow the court rules, but within those broad confines, you can roam freely. I could never work a job where someone was always looking over my shoulder. There's none of that Marxist alienation crap -- The lawyer's product is his own. It's not created using assembly line tactics. Second to science, the law is the best way to put a productive mind to good use. A big lawsuit (even if the plaintiffs only win coupons) can end a lot of aggravation and cure much injustice.
See the above links for more serious (and facetious) takes on the subject. Great reading for the next time you're asking yourself, “why the heck am I doing all of this crap!?”

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January 29, 2005

Grades Perspective and 1L Summer

Buffalo Wings & Vodka joins the chorus of blawggers consoling themselves and each other about the disappointment that too often comes with grades. Mr. Buffalo—who has an impeccably stellar GPA himself and is only joining this chorus out of a desire to help those less fortunate*—offers advice aimed at 1Ls who are concerned that their low grades might prevent them from getting a job, to which he says: Don't worry, you've got a semester to raise your GPA and the first summer job isn't all that important, anyway. Mr. Buffalo concludes:
Mainly, remember that it's only law school. Have some fun. Hell, after a semester, you probably don't even want to be a lawyer anymore. So why stress? 
* This post has been modified at the request of Blawg Wisdom's vast audience. Please see the comments for more details.

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October 29, 2004


What makes me laugh out loud in the library and choke on my Vanilla Diet Coke?

The allegations. The complaint. The next step in legal world domination.

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October 22, 2004

It's a job but without it I'd be less than what I expect from me*

OK...I know that officially I am the Queen of the Friday Funnies. However, of late I have been in a bit of 2L angst over what I really want to be when I grow up. And, after I asked readers over at Favorable Dicta to tell me about their jobs and why they liked them, I had requests from readers to make sure I compiled whatever information I got (and there was a similar request at Blawg Wisdom this week). So, here we go with what I have so far.

Blonde Justice has a great post on why she loves being a public defender. Additionally, I'm a PD is all about the day to day life of a PD and is very informative and interesting.

If you're wondering about what a day in the life of a DA looks like, Mister District Attorney is all over it...not only does he have this post describing what exactly a DA does and is, but he also did a "week in the life" series a couple of months ago.

I'm going to try to get together some other posts covering different areas, but lest you think I'm leaving you without some Friday humor...how about Rufus T. Firefly giving us some "alternate uses" for our law degrees. My fave? "Have laminated and then sharpen edges to slit the throat of the college career counselor who advised you to go to law school." Yup. I'm probably gonna go out and buy a laminating machine right this very weekend. Also, the Types of Lawyers series from Evan over at Notes From the (Legal) Underground is funny...but sometimes funny-a-little-too-close-to-home rather than funny-haha-none-of-this-applies-to-me.

*Jimmy Buffett, "It's My Job"

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October 08, 2004

Captain's log: a bunch of our ship fell off, and, nobody likes me.*

OK...I'm supposed to be the Queen of the Friday Funnies...and last week I didn't even post I don't think because I've been so busy. And, truth be told, I think a lot of other students have been pretty busy too...because there hasn't been tons of posting lately at many of my favorite haunts. So, I thought to myself, what could I do to soothe all the frail and haunted law students that come here looking for a little bit of comic relief on another Friday spent library-bound? And then it hit me...OK, really I read this post over at AI and was inspired...so, I decided my contribution this week will be some recommendations and links towards blogs I go to when I need a little break from the rigors of law school insanity.

For when you're in class, listening to your ConLaw prof drone on and on about petty little things like "The Commerce Clause" and "Due Process" and you just want to look at pretty girls...you need Soupie's BBQ & Daycare.

For when you desperately need to feel like you're not the only one with a killer hangover OR a legal memo ruining your life...you need Naked Drinking Coffee.

For when you need the wisdom and acerbic wit kindly words of someone who's been there...you need Running with Lawyers.

For when you miss The Republic (and don't we all?)...you need Lonestar Expat.

For when you don't want to have to read it yourself...you need Life, Law, Libido...they'll do it for you!

For when you're on double secret probation...you need Sugar, Mr. Poon?

And finally, for when you just need someone you can actually count on (as opposed to me) for something worthwhile to read on a Friday...you need Half-Cocked, sponsor of the Fabulous Friday Fetish.

I hope this helps point you towards some comic relief, which, if you're in law school, you desperately need. I hope to have some topical Friday Funnies compilations in the near future...perhaps after the tragic end successful conclusion of OCI.

*For those of you who (god forbid) don't know...that's from Mystery Science Theatre 3000: The Movie...which always makes me laugh until I choke. I mean that in the best possible sense of the word "choke."

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September 24, 2004

A kind of lame effort...but at least I tried! I'm busy, OK???

OK...it's time for the Friday Funnies and I just realized right now that it's Thursday night, I've been busy like crazy the past couple of days due to obligations this last week before school starts, and I haven't been keeping up with my daily blog stalking reading. So, thankfully, a reader sent in a link to this funny post over at Nuts and Boalts...enjoy!

Additionally, I guess it's not really a Friday Funny, but as a 2L who is always kind of thinking about classes and what to take, even if just in the back of my mind...this post over at Begging the Question is a wonderful walk down registration memory lane by Milbarge. Great advice!

I'm hoping to have some time tomorrow to find and post some other funny stuff -- I don't want anyone to think I don't take my job as Queen of the Friday Funnies seriously...as always, if you, the loyal readers of Blawg Wisdom, see something funny (or write something funny) be sure to shoot us an email and let us know so we can post it!!

PS: I knew I could count on him...check out the Nine Master Types of Clerkships over at Jeremy's.

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September 17, 2004

Letters to Gunners

One of the most oft-mined veins of law school humor is known as "make fun o' the gunner!" Stories about the people (usually male) who really couldn't shut up to save their lives, the kiddies with the spring-loaded hands that keep shooting up in class even when said hand interrupts the professor mid-sentence and derails everyone's train of thought. Yeah, those are gunners, and they're so fun to mock it never seems gets old. Want proof? See Hoya Slapsa's Open Letter to the Section Four Gunner. It's short, and so very sweet. For more wide-ranging and sarcastic advice for both gunners and several other, um, "special" types of law student, Transmogriflaw kindly offers For the Special Students. Of course, we all know that any post that begins with compliments about Blawg Wisdom is a post that deserves the immediate and close attention of the masses. Flattery (and good sarcasm) will get you everywhere. See all this attention gunners get? It's really because we love them. Here's to you, law school gunner guys (and girls)!

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OCI, for those days when private humiliation just isn't good enough.

Well, it's that time of the year again. No, not Talk Like a Pirate Day (well, not ONLY that)...On Campus Interviews! So much fun for all involved. Really. So, this week's Friday Funnies are dedicated to the fun, the glamour, the overwhelming feeling of complete inadequacy known as OCI.

First thing you have to do is get an interview. I'm gonna help you out with that over at Favorable Dicta with "OCI: Where Grades Are The Most Important Thing About You...EVER!"

Next, once you have some interviews scheduled, head on over to Wings and Vodka for some Tips on Interviewing. Tip #4 "Think Before You Speak" is especially helpful when you get an extra-special question that comes from deep within the tortured soul of an interviewing attorney. For Example:

"So, tell me what high school was like?"


"What do you think will be the worst thing about this job?"

And, should you be looking for advice on job-hunting done in the evil devil on shoulder vs. sweet angel on shoulder format, well then, Jeremy has just the post for you. Also, as I am a HUGE stalker fan of Jeremy's, you can read all of his OCI advice (and pretty much everything else, sorted categorically) here.

If you follow this advice, then you can have a soul-numbing successful OCI experience to reminisce about in therapy with friends and family for years to come.

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September 03, 2004

It's Friday, so it must be funny. Except this title which is not funny at all. Give me a break though, it's late, and I haven't had a Diet Coke in almost four hours.

Hello, it's me, Energy Spatula, back for another round of Friday Funnies.

First, we have Alan. Alan is the author of a blog called A Season of Mists and he has a very funny two part series on the Top Ten Worst Answers to Interview Questions...(Part One) (Part Two).

Next up is Soupie. Soupie is having some trials and tribulations in his primary role as a hero of the intergalactic lawfighter variety. Let's all wish Soupie (and his groove) a speedy return to full-on Master of the Universe status.

Third (thirdly?), Buffalo Wings and Vodka would like you to know " What The Supremes Are Doing Over The Labor Day Weekend." I'm glad to see O'Connor will be drunk-dialing old boyfriends, that's probably what I'll be doing too, at least if past history of holidays that include beer are any indication.

Last but not least, Justin R. Adin, of J. Concurring in Dissent, has a great post over at Notes from the (Legal) Underground, titled " Advice to 1L's: How To Read Weblogs During Class." The most important advice any 1L will ever get. Ever.

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August 27, 2004

Back to School...The Good, The Bad, and The Alcohol

First off, thanks to AI for giving me this great opportunity to spread the word that law school doesn't have to be all anxiety, social awkwardness and solitary binge-drinking...it can be all those things and SO MUCH MORE.

For my first attempt at the Friday Funnies I thought I would direct your attention to a few noteworthy blogs whose authors have headed back to school...and some very informative posts born of that great law school tradition, the "Let's All Get To Know Each Other" Mixer.

Steve over at Half-Cocked has some good advice for those attending their first law school free beer event. Pedro at Lawrocker details four easy things you can do to not inspire the hatred of your peers (link via Lonestar Expat). And finally, the meet and greet from a 1L point of view over at Ex Mea Sententia.

Lastly, just because I think it's so funny, check out this post at Naked Drinking Coffee titled "How I Hope Law School Classes Will Be"...yeah, I hoped they would be like that too...but so far, not so much.

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August 26, 2004

Welcome the Queen!

It's Friday, which is funny, don't you think? Oh, it's not? Well just wait, because Blawg Wisdom has a real treat for you today (or soon). Announcing Energy Spatula, our new Queen of the Funny Wisdom, or Queen of Wise Funnies, or Wise of Funny Queens, or something like that. What I know for sure is: she rocks, and that's what matters.

Every Friday (or every other Friday, or every third Friday, or just whenever she has time and feels like it and has or knows about some good material), Energy Spatula will be posting Friday Funnies here at Blawg Wisdom for your enlightenment and enjoyment. She'll be posting links to satirical, sarcastic, witty, and otherwise humorous bits of advice and thoughts about law school. There are numerous examples of this type of post, and we hope that our funnies will make you laugh, or at least allow you to blow off steam knowing that someone else feels exactly as you do about the gunner in row three. (Apologies to gunners; we know you can't really help it and we love you anyway. Most of the time.)

So welcome, ES! Let the funnies begin!

Note: I have no idea if ES has any funnies lined up for today, and if she doesn't, don't hold it against her. She'll get around to it when she feels like it. Got it?

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August 20, 2004

All the Funny That's Fit To Print -- and then some

Thanks to the ever sparkly Energy Spatula, this week's edition of the Friday Funnies (the latest and possibly greatest category of wisdom!) brings you A Day In the Life of Energy Spatula -- Girl Slacker, "complete with beer drinking, bejeweled, canned case briefs and a whole lot of caffeine."

Also not to be missed is Sage Advice from Soupie's BBQ and Daycare (Now with more Sugar!!) -- "the super-secret advice that will give you a proverbial (or literal, if you enjoy such things) leg up on your competitors."

Finally, cruise on over to Lonestar Expat for a series of excellent and funny takes on OCI and interviews:

  1. OCI Pt. 1: This here's better'n snuff, ain't half as dusty.
  2. OCI Pt. 2: It don't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep
  3. OCI Pt. 3: Never slap a man who's chewin' tobacco
  4. OCI Pt. 4: Lettin the cat out of the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin it back in.
  5. OCI Pt. 5: Stories from the trenches
And you thought law school wouldn't be fun!

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August 13, 2004

Friday Funnies

Not all "advice" for law students is completely serious. In fact, a lot of it is very funny. In that vein, check out this list of things you must bring with you to law school from Energy Spatula
and Top Ten Ways to Celebrate the End of Your Summer Job from Alan at A Season of Mists.

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